Sunday, September 25, 2011

Revelation

Today was a hard day. It started out okay...pretty typical. But it quickly went downhill. It was one of those morning where none of my little treasures were listening and I had to repeat myself way too many times. "First time obedience" was completely out the door and that just puts me in a bad mood. So instead of shutting myself away and dropping to my knees, I let the anger consumer me. I yelled. I spanked. I was frustrated beyond belief. And for what? Toys on the ground...dishes in the sink...messy rooms...little boys in pajamas instead of "church" clothes... Really, Mandy? You got in a frenzy from this? You are a mom of four precious treasures who are too young to live in perfection. They are too young to know that a good reaction for a mommy in a bad mood is to clean. They are just too young for unrealistic expectations.

At church this morning the Lord revealed my sin in flashing lights. Anger. At times it stays contained and controlled in my heart. At other times it makes its nasty appearance and rules. Not okay. Not okay at all.

"Everyone (Mandy) should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger, for man's (Mandy's) anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." (James 1:19-20)

As soon as I got home, I wrote this verse on my bathroom mirror...big and in bold. And I can't tell you how often I prayed this back to the Lord today. Take my anger...I want that righteous life You desire for me. I don't want my kids to have to walk on eggshells...not knowing my current mood. This verse is now stored in my heart and will hopefully snuff the anger out.

Plus, just look at these sweet faces... How can I allow my anger to cause them angst?






Maybe I'll share the other revelation He laid on my heart later. This is a pretty vulnerable post for me.

3 comments:

Lauren said...

Thank you for this. I am going to write that verse on my mirror, too.

I love that verse, but my mind has not been turning to it lately--I have let my own motives get in the way of God's desires!

::SIGH:: Love you so much.

Clark Family said...

Hi lovely. As you 100% already know... I've been there... I am there...

But glad we get to live this life together. Glad He showers wildest grace down all over us Mamas. Glad He gave His Son. Glad He gives us hope.

Thanks for praying for me in my moments. glad to pray with you in yours.

Love you so very much sweet friend! :)

Sahsa said...

I NEEDED this today. And yesterday. :) Thank you for allowing yourself to be vulnerable do we can read your words of wisdom. Love you!